American Values And Purchasing Truth
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Respect should be earned and not just given easily. In America today, as in the case of Donald Trump seated as President, it would seem that the person with the loudest voice gets the most respect from the people. Current politicians capture the nation via empathy and confident self-marketing, and people are subtly hijacked of their American values and true freedom to choose. Listen to this episode as hosts Bill Stierle and Tom discuss how we must be careful to separate confidence from integrity and respect.
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Bill, we often talk about many different ways that truth gets purchased and that continues to divide us as a country. I don’t think we talk enough about how we’re going to have some restoration. I thought it would be good to take another swing at that given the events.
We’re in a cycle that we’ve got to start taking some actions towards restoration. The candidate that moves to the front of the Democratic field because the Republican field, Donald Trump and regrettably the Republicans are not pursuing restoration. There’s no win in it for them other than helping the nation out. There’s no win in it for their party if they start down the path of restoration, but they need that desperately. They’re not able to do that because they’ve painted themselves in a corner. Their off-ramp is similar to what I’m going to recommend for the Democrats. Regrettably, they don’t have a very strong narrative to know how to get out of this thing because they’re trapped in their own cycle of things. Let’s talk about what our country needs for restoration. How do we get there? What is the path or the journey that will take us there? What candidates can say or do to not only create a differentiating message but also create a message of what the country is to remend or reheal itself?
When you get a split identity of Republicans and Democrats and then a third entity, an identity of independence that thinks and speaks a certain way, they think that this way of thinking is going to work best. We need to clean up the mess. We’ve got to start down what the mess is. The mess we’re in is Joe Biden is reported, but not true scandal because it’s already been researched that the problem shows up. It’s really Russia doing the hacking, not the Ukrainians. It’s not coming from that place. The way to clean up the mess has got to be that we need to talk about what the integrity of a process looks like. Instead of the more dopamine boosting, there’s a danger over here. The danger is them, not us. They’re the corrupt one. Now marks the ending of the Hillary Clinton email server investigation.
The entire exhaustive investigation is complete and they found no intentional wrongdoing. It ends the investigation. I don’t know if it puts the whole thing to rest because there are those that despite the investigation don’t believe it.
There’s no healing for somebody at the Republican convention. Somebody at a rally yelling, “Lock her up.” Not believing that what they’ve been yelling for several years is not true. They can’t believe that because their brain has so much investment in the other side is evil. It’s like holding in years past to caucus and George Bush number one. There was this ad campaign about Willie Horton getting released from prison and doing a crime while to caucus was the governor of Massachusetts. It wasn’t even the caucus’ policy. It was the previous governor’s policy that this furlough program took place that this guy got let out of jail and did something bad. All of a sudden it was Willie Horton. The caucus were right next to each other. It’s very problematic. It’s doing the same thing. Hillary Clinton and her emails are forever wired together. Joe Biden, his son and Ukraine are being wired together chronologically.
It’s been looked into and there’s no evidence of wrongdoing, but in the eyes of half the country or close to it, the Republicans keep saying, “Something’s not right about Joe Biden and his son.” Not only Ukraine but then they start tapping the brain to say, “China too.” Somebody has got to look into this. It’s almost that they’re letting it raising it to the level of a crime that it isn’t being investigated the way that Hillary Clinton’s emails were. This is already having a major negative impact on the electorate’s impression of Joe Biden.
It’s affecting their impression of Joe Biden. The process of doing this reward, anticipation, uncertainty, this dopamine boosting narrative is not about finding the truth. It’s about creating doubt and skepticism inside the listener and the candidate. When I see his poster, I’m going like, “What about Ukraine? Why didn’t you tell your son not to take the money and not go there? What kind of leader are you that would let your son do that?” It’s like, are you realizing that the fox is stealing chickens out of the chicken hen? The golden eggs of American integrity and respect. You’re not going to point at that because he’s your guy or he makes you feel better or listening to what they’re talking about on their side makes you feel better because they’re using a technique on you about, “Here’s a reward. Here’s some anticipation. What happens if he does find out? What are we going to do?” “I’m not sure but if you reelect me, I can make a difference because that’s why it’s been so hard these several years because they been obstructing me.” It’s like you’re doing crimes. Notice how our brain is easily drifted back into the problem and not focusing on the solution. Notice that the inflammation shows up in our brain.
The reality is the President could easily say the same thing happened to him when everybody’s trying to find collusion and we got to investigate it. There must be a collision there. There was no evidence found of the administration colluding with the Russians to interfere in the election, but that was not the point of the investigation. The point of the investigation was to see if the Russians in fact did meddle in our elections, which they did. That’s not what anybody talks about the results.
Robert Mueller said they’re doing it again. That was several months ago that he said that. Here it is, several months later and Facebook pulled down 40 coordinated accounts that were spreading negative messages on both sides of Joe Biden that he’s not progressive enough.
They’re still doing it, still trying to divide us further because that division is what Russia is going after. They ended up reaching their goal of sewing discontent. That’s to put it too mildly, to stir up all trouble in the US that is going to keep people from actually seeing the truth and making a good a decision with their vote.
You use the word discontent.
I didn’t feel it was strong enough, but I did use that.
Discontent is a vibration that it’s a little unsettling. I’m a little unsettled about Joe Biden because for the last several months, all I’ve heard is about he’s a hunter. I know he has a son named Hunter. I know his son, Beau, died. I know his wife died in a car wreck. Discontent is a gateway to doubt, which is a gateway to skepticism. For doing scary honesty about this thing and we’re talking about how language is used to purchase truth. The challenge then becomes how do you get doubt and skepticism out of your body?
That’s the healing and the restoration part of it. A truth and reconciliation commission is something to put into place to host and to foster. We need truth and reconciliation to mend the nation. Let’s facilitate that. The candidate that says, “If I’m elected, the first thing I would do is host and promote a truth and reconciliation for our nation. Because these last several years of campaign and this presidency, we need truth and reconciliation to heal our nation. What we need and what is essential is what the United States stands for. We’re going to refortify ourself.”
Notice I introduced a concept here called the truth and reconciliation. If South Africa could do this with apartheid, we could clearly do this as a nation. I wouldn’t mind leading it. I’m sure there is a whole team of people that would get on board about how to lead this truth and reconciliation. What does it take to have people vent how they were taken by? What took place inside them the truth and reconciliation, and how to do that best?
That is very much needed. The only candidate that I see speaking anything in the neighborhood of this is Pete Buttigieg. He’s rising in the polls. He’s number three in Iowa and in double digits in 13% compared to 17% or 18%. Ahead of him is Elizabeth Warren. Joe Biden’s been slipping because of all of this amplification or proportionalization of his son’s involvement on the board of this company in Ukraine. Of course, the Republicans are all saying, “What about this and what about that? We need to investigate it.” Joe Biden has also not been helping himself with how he talks about all this stuff at times. There was an interview with Pete Buttigieg on Meet the Press where he actually talked about for the first time, something you and I have been saying from the beginning about making sure no one meddles in our elections in the future. He hasn’t been screaming it at every rally and wearing it like a badge of honor that, “I am going to go and stop the Russians from doing this.” If he does that, it will help him tremendously.
He is talking about, and it’s because he believes it to his core, that there is a restoration that needs to take place. He’s not using that word yet. That’s something that if Elizabeth Warren who is the front runner were to speak like that, she would actually run away as the front runner. She’s still stuck on the, “I have a plan, here’s my plan. Here’s how I’m going to pay for Medicare for all.” Because she’s being attacked from all sides with, “You can’t pay for it.” She’s trying to defend that.
The truth never gets won by explanation. You can’t win truth by problem-solving. You can’t win the truth by giving advice. There’s no way to do it because the person is already entrenched and they’ve already invested their choice. Their decision has been bought already by the partial truth the other person has sold to them. The partial truth is the thing that has caused that impact to take place. Joe Biden is a nice person, a seasoned politician, a statesman. Somebody that sits there and knows how to listen to somebody that has the label of racist and somebody that doesn’t agree with him. He knows how to sit there and listen. His tools are not as strong as the ones that we’re proposing, but it doesn’t mean that he hasn’t had a great career. He’s got there from here. Clearly, if there is an adaptation of a new set of tools, an adaption of the integrated needs-based narrative or value-based narrative that’s needed to restore and how to get there from here. It’s the same thing with Elizabeth Warren. A nice person, high integrity, just doesn’t know how to deliver it to the common person.
You’ve made a good point, Bill. Certainly, Joe Biden has the resume and the history and Elizabeth Warren does also to a large degree. They’re not that different in age and experience. They each have a very clear history of commitment to the nation and to help people. What would seal the deal for every one of them is if they will be a “wise parent” or adult in the room and not ride on that record and say, “I’ve got the record and experience so you can all feel safe. Your need for safety is met. Your need for certainty is met. I am going to deliver on what I promised or certainly do my level best to deliver on that. What we need as a nation is to heal and bring us together.” Start to talk about the reconciliation piece. If Elizabeth Warren was a part of a completely new government office or agency, the Consumer Protection Bureau, she knows how to start a new one. It could be a commission on truth and reconciliation in America. She would then own it and run away with this democratic nomination if she showed that feeling and heart, which is where she is vulnerable. I don’t think she’s as empathetic or at least doesn’t appear to be as empathetic.
She appears to be friendly but she doesn’t appear to be empathetic. The formula for empathy that I use and I promote and all the people that have been trained by me and trained in this technique is the ability to be strong at the same time as doing empathy. Not do the lesser version of sympathy, but the ability to connect with where somebody is and be there with them with their belief as their belief has to fall off at some time. When somebody buys a belief, it’s very difficult for them to let it go. Even if a person does dispel the belief with facts and truth without empathy, it still doesn’t work. I’m going to go back to a very poignant moment in the field of time. It’s John McCain running for president. He’s on the stage. This woman comes on stage and says, “Barack Obama is a Muslim.” All of a sudden, she goes into this belief. His truth and integrity have got to deal with that.
That’s worth noting right there because Donald Trump in that situation wouldn’t have done that. He would have nodded and let her belief fester and pivoted away from that, but let it hang out there or step into it and amplify it. With John McCain, I agree with you to his credit. Honestly, it’s pretty clear that people reading these episodes know that we’re not the most conservative people in the world. I could have voted for John McCain, especially way back in 2000 when he was running against George W. Bush and was the maverick, the more independent. John McCain had integrity and he was not going to let that myth be perpetuated that Barack Obama was a Muslim. That’s worth noting because John McCain, certainly Patriot, great American man of honor and his integrity wouldn’t let that go.
It costs him votes by doing it that way.
It probably cost him the election in many ways.
Let me show you what he could have done, “Ma’am, you would like me to hear that you have a thought or a belief that Barack Obama’s a Muslim. Am I hearing that thought correctly?” She’d say, “Yes.”
She would absolutely say yes to that.
“You really have a conviction about not voting for somebody that is a different religion than yours, is that correct?” “Yes.” Notice I’m in two sentences of agreement already. The third sentence is, “It’s one of the wonderful things as Americans that we can have different faiths and still be able to vote here where other countries don’t get that opportunity. Even though that you are feeling doubtful and skeptical about Barack Obama’s religion, the truth is that he is a Christian. He goes to Christian churches. As Americans and as religious people, we get to have whatever religion we like here. The issue here if you’d like to vote for me is the thing I stand for is this. He stands for something different.” He got to that too early.
He says, “I happened to disagree with you. No, ma’am, he’s not a Muslim. He’s a good man but I happened to disagree with them.” You’re right, it got there too quickly. The way you did that was masterful. This is the skill that any candidate who would learn this skill and adopt it would rule the US in a hurry and win public enrollment big time.
You’ve got to reenroll people into America. It’s the weirdest time ever. We ever thought we had to reenroll ourselves into integrity. We have to reenroll ourselves into mutual respect. We have to make America’s handshake great again. Somebody steal that, please. Let’s do that. Let’s go make some t-shirts and put them up.
Do you remember hands across America way back in the late ’80s or early ’90s?
It was a big unifier. They almost got it done. To think all the media cared about was a few miles out in the middle of deserts that they didn’t have enough people at and that’s what they covered. They weren’t able to get it done because it’s like, “Do you know what happened there about unity across America?”
The skill that you shined a light on here for us of showing empathy, asking a couple of questions and getting a couple of levels of agreement with the person that has a strong belief is so critical and I can see the future. We’re a year out from the final stretch to the election and there are going to be probably at least three presidential debates, one of which will be in October of 2020. I can see that as long as Donald Trump doesn’t get removed from the office, I can see the democratic candidate. If they actually develop some skill and get some training in the presidential debate, each candidate is supposed to be able to make statements or answer questions and be uninterrupted by the other candidate.
However, we’ve already seen with Trump debating Hillary Clinton, he can’t do that. When Hillary Clinton would say something about Donald Trump that, “He is this or he is that or he won’t do this.” Donald Trump always chimes in and says, “No, not here. No, that’s not me.” He cannot stop himself and play by the rules of one person talking at a time. When the Democratic candidate were to ask a question saying, “I’m guessing the president is feeling doubt and skepticism over this, is that right?” Donald Trump would not be able to help himself but agree and say, “Yes.”
What he would not know is the doubt and skepticism is the coat that he put on. “President Donald Trump is feeling doubtful and skeptical about Joe Biden’s doing in Ukraine?” “Yes.” I gave up oxygen for a moment to the conspiracy. “It sounds like that he chose because he had the thought as the President that he could do what he would like. He chose to have Rudy Giuliani be part of his press secretary as an international.” “Yes.”
As a negotiator, investigator, part of the State Department.
“Part of the State Department without being appointed because he can take advice from anybody he wants?” “Yes.” “It sounds like he was so doubtful and skeptical about the career professionals that have been there for years that they had any skill or ability to be there. Is that right?” “Yes.” Their testimony, they said, “This and this.” He’s already on the plank. He doesn’t see himself and there’s no walking back from his own yeses when done with empathy. There’s always a walk back when you’re doing it from an explanation.
When you explain something, you could always walk it back and reexplain. I’m re-explaining. That’s what they’re doing. Mick Mulvaney did it. He’s trying to reexplain, “There are three things. This, this and this.” The third one was dangerous. The next time he was on the next show the next day, “There are two things. This and this.” The newscasters are going like, “Do they not know that they’re being recorded?” The answer is, this is what all the news people are making the mistake of, is it’s a reinforcing narrative of confidence. It’s not trying to clean up the truth. They’re not trying to be truthful.
They’re trying to amplify the things that are in alignment with the right side of the issue and inflate those in proportion and let the other one fall to the side. That’s what they’re trying to do. It is hilarious. It’s easier when it was Mick Mulvaney speaking at the podium. It’s easier for the President to disassociate himself from that and say, “Mick Mulvaney had it wrong.” It’s a little different.
What if you’re the President saying it yourself, then it becomes harder to walk back. The Inigo Montoya defense doesn’t work. I don’t think that means what you think it means.
One of the physiological Hawks that have happened inside the Donald Trump voter is that because a person is confident, they must have integrity and they must have respect. Those three things do not go together. Confidence, just because somebody is confident doesn’t mean they have integrity. It doesn’t mean they have respect. There are a lot of parents, fathers and mothers that show confidence around respect. You are to give your parents respect because we are your parents. We are your elders. This is something that is also translated and has been hijacked. You keep using hijack, but it’s really been purchased. I paid the repetition. Watch the media take it on. If I am the father that gets respect without being questioned and I’m the President because I got here because I get respect without being questioned. It’s going into a very old, deep pathology that our country is struggling with. Let alone the old patriarch that is still in place, that the women are coming forward finally. The punitive God regrettably is in the same father. You give respect to God even though that there’s this bad thing that happened. You don’t get to question his motives about why these people drowned in a hurricane. There is some cognitive disconnect that is also being purchased too.
Would you say, Bill, that’s a difference between respect demanded and respect earned? Is there something different there?
That’s correct. It’s not earned, it’s demanded. The person with the loudest voice gets the most respect. It’s like, “No, you don’t. You happen to have the loudest voice.”
You get attention.
You get to be heard. You get to be a great carnival barker, “Come in and see this show. Look inside this tent, you will not believe what’s inside this tent. Imagine what it would be like you sitting inside this tent and seeing this thing that no one else has seen before.” All of that stuff is a Donald Trump narrative. Why? It’s because he’s a salesperson and a marketer. He doesn’t see that he’s doing anything wrong because it’s always what he’s done to sell and market his property.
It’s all about him. It’s all about me if you’re him, not about the people or America. He is trying to have the people in America believe that he’s meeting their needs when in reality everything he’s doing is to meet his own needs of self-worth and respect.
You could make a false claim about a product if you’re marketing. If nobody calls you on it, you get a pass. If the false claim causes harm or damage, then there could be a class-action suit that this thing caused permanent harm and damage. You’ve got to get a payout for that. There’s some money there because they did cause harm, they did promise and they did not put it on the box in the finest small print ever that this thing could cause X, Y and Z problem to happen. You get a pass on it. The only problem right now is that same technique is in the President’s office. He’s getting a pass on over promotion of a product, of a belief, of a decision-making process that is not in an integrity or an alignment with the law. It just is it. There are some problems that we’re dealing with right now that we need to restore.
Is the key to that restoration hidden within the examples in the technique we’ve talked about? It is back to empathy and compassion, but the leader needs to do it on a large scale, on a national scale, maybe to create a commission on truth and restoration in America. It seems to be rooted in empathy. Does it not?
It is rooted in empathy and skilled empathy, not just sympathy and saying, “You guys lost. That’s too bad. I’m glad we could talk this thing out.” No, it’s, “You’ve been sold a truth that we’re not going to beat you up for. You voted for Donald Trump last time and it caused us all a lot of trouble and it divided us as Americans, but we’re not going to hold that against you. You were hijacked by the best of them and we’re good because we’ve all bought things that we didn’t want and wanted to return but couldn’t.”
Amazing how that would paint this administration as a Furby, a product that people bought.
If any of the politicians are reading this episode, which I would recommend highly because I’m going to keep giving diamonds out every single sentence. Kamala Harris could say this, “The way we need to start thinking about Donald Trump is the way he plays golf.” All of a sudden, it’s dangling. In golf, there’s a thing called the Mulligan. Donald Trump’s a mulligan and let that run in the media.
Everybody who has their self-worth attached to that, they voted for Donald Trump.
It’s a mulligan. You get another choice. Vote something different this time.
It’s an off-ramp.
The voter needs an off-ramp. Their self-worth, respect and integrity, they get to say, “My vote was a mulligan.” Everybody looked like, “Come back to Thanksgiving dinner.” “Why?” “It’s because it was a mulligan. You made a mistake. We all suffer from it. We’ve got to jab you for it a little bit, but quite frankly it was a mulligan. We’re good. You’re our family. Come back.” It keeps going.
There’s got to be a way to create a MAGA hat where somehow there’s a mulligan in that.
There’s a price thing here. There’s a windfall here. The red mulligan vote is what’s in the hat.
What we need to do just like you do at the baseball stadium, turn it into a rally cap where you take a MAGA hat, turn it inside out and make it a mulligan hat, “We’re going to rally and get out of this mulligan we’ve been in.” Maybe we’re beating the mulligan thing too much. I like the idea though.
Keep messages of integrity and respect so that there’s a confidence. There’s one thing that we’ve got to learn from President Donald Trump is that he is confident. Not particularly attached to any particular dogma or value other than himself, his properties, the finance, the money, his rich and his identity of being rich. People give rich people a push on respect, “You are rich. Why are you respecting that? They might not have earned a penny of it or aren’t doing anything of value with it.” It’s important to separate confidence from integrity and respect.
A lot of people in America don’t understand that because most people in America, the middle and lower classes, the majority of America is not rich. They view inherently as the wealth as being a value in itself and that, “He must have done something or he must be smart. He’s gotten rich.” They give him a pass on many qualities that they otherwise might be looking for in a candidate who was not rich.
People think because a person is confident, they must have integrity and respect, but those three things do not go together.
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Let’s finish off on this thing called perspective regarding respect. I’ve got my hands. There’s something that Americans need that’s vital to us for our existence. It’s transportation. We need that. In the environment, there is an entire range of ways you can get your need for transportation. We’d all agree that the one at the bottom of this is walking. That is one way to meet the need for transportation. Right above that are bikers because you’re still under your own power. Buses are right next to that. Trains might be next to that. As soon as you get past this train piece, all of a sudden you’ve got to walk into personalized autos. There is a whole range of transportation. You and I jump into a new Mercedes and drive that around. Somehow respect gets purchased over here.
You’re not getting respect necessarily by riding a bike, walking, taking a bus or doing a train. If you’re in a Mercedes, a Lexus, a Lamborghini, a Tesla, all of a sudden there is a push of respect in your direction saying, “You have accomplished something in capitalism. You have managed money in such a way and do it.” There’s a way to heal because when something is sold as a high-end vehicle, but is at best a low-end car, that is the problem that the Republican voters are going to face. They purchased this person that said they were luxury. Donald Trump said he was intelligent and he still does. He says that he’s the best and he could solve it, “I did that. I got rid of ISIS. I rounded them up.” You didn’t do anything. Your team gives it. How are you claiming this? You are not the luxury car but you better honor the people that made the car.
You might be okay that you purchased the car and that you happen to be driving in it. That under your leadership, something like this took place, that you funded X, Y and Z strategy to get it done. If he would have said it that way, he would have gained votes. All Donald Trump would have had to say is the following sentence, “I’m really delighted that the funding for the military that we approved at the start of my administration contributed greatly to putting ISIS in displace. It’s time for our troops to come home.”
It’s a completely different perspective.
Regrettably, his own respect, his own identity, his self-worth is so wrapped up in the, “I did.” He took advantage of having both houses that would vote extraordinary, bloated military surgeon spending that he could have leveraged that spending piece into this thing. If any of his people are reading, they could literally steal it and the votes would move in their direction. That’s why this is not so much, even though we’re being a smarty-pants. This is not a partisan piece. This is what’s good for America. Of course, if anybody with integrity would say, “What is good for America?” We’re not giving him this talking point because it is a good talking point, but it’s not helpful.
That would continue to purchase truth away from restoration, although it would certainly give respect to all the others that contributed to that results.
That could be one of the Republican’s off-ramps, “Donald Trump was this character and we’re really glad we voted for him, but what we did do was we voted to get this. Now, we’ve got to go back and fix what the President has done that we’ve impeached him.” The Republicans can have a very clean off-ramp there.
If they have the desire to look within themselves and learn and improve with their communication, their messaging and their language skills, which has a big if.
I feel doubtful and skeptical that the need for integrity is high on their list because they’re in defensive mode and they don’t know how to restore integrity or respect. What they’re doing is they’re doubling down in the wrong direction away from integrity and respect. The democratic candidate that starts calling them out on it might sound like this, “I’ve lost respect. I feel very doubtful and skeptical about extending respect to Lindsey Graham.” Notice what I did. I put the two feeling words, doubt and skepticism next to the word respect because he was confident during the Bill Clinton impeachment about what integrity looked like. I feel doubtful of skepticism that I’m going to assign integrity to the things that he says and does. All of a sudden, he’s got to take a shower to try to get rid of the doubt and skepticism that’s on it because he is lingering with the emotional projection of another person. Donald Trump does this in a different way, but that’s for our next episode.
Bill, I appreciate that. I agree with you. We need restoration in America. It happens the way the pendulum has swung so far to the right and dividing us. We have to somehow bring it back into the middle or further to the left from where it is. It wouldn’t matter who’s in the office. The restoration is about healing, compassion and empathy. It happens the parties are where they are. To do that probably means a shift of the party in power because the one that’s there can’t bring that reconciliation.
It’s going to be interesting to see where we could go next with this. It’s very volatile. We’ve got so many wounds. There’s a little of a triage narrative that’s going on. You and I can talk about how to deal with this level of turbulence and to do the triage narrative that’s needed, maybe that’s what we go after is Purchasing Truth in a crisis triage environment.
Thanks, Bill. Until next time.
Thanks, Tom.
